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Tuesday, November 12, 2013

10 ways to have the Best Date Night

 
The purpose of Date Night is the time to RECONNECT and REDISCOVER each other and leave the demands of the daily schedule behind. 
 
You've probably heard this from me before, but it is impossible stay connected throughout an entire marriage without working for it.  A marriage consists of the cycle of connecting, disconnecting, and reconnecting again.  The disconnection is inevitable.  In fact, the trouble in a marriage (i.e. an affair) doesn't stem from the DISCONNECTION, but when we don't make the effort to RECONNECT when needed! 
 
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People often misunderstand that in order to have a good date night, it must be well planned, elaborate or expensive.  While all of these things can contribute to amazing date nights, they are not necessary to having some of the best dates of your life.  You will find that the best date nights don't rely on what you DO on them, as much as what you FEEL from them.  We need to feel CONNECTED to each other.  And when we feel connected we feel happier and more secure in our relationship.  Here are 10 ways you can be sure to connect on date night:best date night, ways to have a good date, keep the love alive, date night ideas
 
1.  Touching.  Let me start by saying that it is not a true date night without touching each other.  Hold hands, touch their back, give their leg a squeeze, lean in for a kiss, the possibilities are endless.
2.  Meaningful Conversation.  Put your phones away and focus on each other!  In a world where texting is becoming the dominant way to communicate, chances for a one on one conversation are more important than ever! If you need help, you can always google conversations starters, like my 50 random questions found HERE.
3. Take turns doing what the other person loves to do.  You may not love going to a sporting event or you might despise the idea of taking a cooking class together, but if you know your spouse would thoroughly enjoy this, then let yourself find out why!!  Not only might you learn something new from your spouse, but they will feel more connected to you, knowing you care about the things they love.
4.  Planning.  I don't mean spending hours working up the perfect date.  But just enough thought into it to make sure you are not falling back on what is easiest and most convenient. It might even be fun taking turns deciding what you're going to do for date night.
5. Touch each other! PS: there are no rules on PDA when you are married. Who cares if it bothers other people, you are trying to connect with your lover!
6. Try new things.  Get out of your comfort zone.  We know you love the rolls at Texas Roadhouse, or that you crave the Tomato Basil Soup at Zupas.  But it's not going to hurt you to go somewhere NEW.  New foods and places not only stimulate new taste buds, but new growth! It may not be a wonderful experience every time, but it will at least give you something to talk about!
7.  Simplify.  No need to be elaborate.  Go out to eat and then stop at a park and play cards on a blanket. Or take the game home in front of the fire with drinks on a chilly evening.  The phrase "go big or go home" does not apply to date night.
8. Did I mention touching? Heck, find a place to park and do it in the back seat.  You'd be surprised what this will do for your connection. ;)
9.  Wake Up!  Yes, we all start to feel older as the years go by. And yes, we might like to be in bed by 9:30pm, but shake it off!  Stop thinking about how tired you are and let yourself feel alive again and have fun! 
10.  Feel the love.  Take a moment to look at your wife or husband and remember what you love about them.  Just a second to REALLY look at them and ENJOY being there with them.  It's easy to become SO comfortable in our relationship that we stop thinking about how truly blessed we are to be with the person we love.  Be thankful and feel free to mention it. Or even better, show them through touch. ;)

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