Knock your husband's socks off this Valentine's Day

 Just to warn you, I'm just going to let myself go in this post.  Throw all caution to the wind.   Why is it a little bit hard for some of us to talk about the sexual nature of our relationships?!  It just feels like something that should be kept within the bedroom.  Ha!   BUT I am a big believer that we can all learn a lot from each other and I do think that sex should be included in that.  It's just as important a part of our relationships as anything else, and my blog DOES have a lot to do with helping you in your relationships. So here we go!

 

 

"She was standin' in the kitchen with nothin' but her apron on"

Oh yes.

You know where I'm going with this.

No more only having sex late at night with all the lights off.

Have a little fun, will ya?!

 

Some of you might remember this sweet little song, "Somewhere Other Than The Night" by Garth Brooks.  I'm not sure how many people it has inspired, but I know it inspired ME.  I really wanted to do something different last year for Valentines Day. I stepped out of my shell and let me tell you, it was completely worth it.  Here's what you can do:

 

Get rid of the kids before your husband gets home from work. Check!

Shower and shave your legs. Check!

Put on some panties and an apron. (nothing else!)  Check!

Be ready with ingredients to cook dinner together.  Check!

Optional...light some candles, put out some rose petals, set a the dinner table with some bubbly.  Check!

Have an apron ready for the hubby. (of course I'm not going to be the only naked one in the kitchen!) Check!

Be standing in the kitchen with nothing but your apron on when your hubby walks in. Check!

Make love before dinner.  NOPE!

PS: Does anyone REALLY say making love? I was trying to be more appropriate/romantic, but maybe I'll just say what I would normally say. haha

Do it after dinner.  NOPE!

Do it after you massage each other in front of the fire.  NOPE!

 

Don't get me wrong...do plenty of touching, kissing, whatever, but after dinner and after giving each other a massage, we got dressed and went to a movie!! We found ourselves to be very cuddly and touchy feely at the movie and by the time we got home, we were REA-DY.

 

And let me tell you...it was one of the best sexual experiences I've had in my 13 years of marriage....for both of us!

Hope you'll try it! ;)

10 ways to have the Best Date Night

 

The purpose of Date Night is the time to RECONNECT and REDISCOVER each other and leave the demands of the daily schedule behind. 

 

You've probably heard this from me before, but it is impossible stay connected throughout an entire marriage without working for it.  A marriage consists of the cycle of connecting, disconnecting, and reconnecting again.  The disconnection is inevitable.  In fact, the trouble in a marriage (i.e. an affair) doesn't stem from the DISCONNECTION, but when we don't make the effort to RECONNECT when needed! 

 

People often misunderstand that in order to have a good date night, it must be well planned, elaborate or expensive.  While all of these things can contribute to amazing date nights, they are not necessary to having some of the best dates of your life.  You will find that the best date nights don't rely on what you DO on them, as much as what you FEEL from them.  We need to feel CONNECTED to each other.  And when we feel connected we feel happier and more secure in our relationship.  Here are 10 ways you can be sure to connect on date night:

 

1.  Touching.  Let me start by saying that it is not a true date night without touching each other.  Hold hands, touch their back, give their leg a squeeze, lean in for a kiss, the possibilities are endless.

2.  Meaningful Conversation.  Put your phones away and focus on each other!  In a world where texting is becoming the dominant way to communicate, chances for a one on one conversation are more important than ever! If you need help, you can always google conversations starters, like my 50 random questions found HERE.
3. Take turns doing what the other person loves to do.  You may not love going to a sporting event or you might despise the idea of taking a cooking class together, but if you know your spouse would thoroughly enjoy this, then let yourself find out why!!  Not only might you learn something new from your spouse, but they will feel more connected to you, knowing you care about the things they love.
4.  Planning.  I don't mean spending hours working up the perfect date.  But just enough thought into it to make sure you are not falling back on what is easiest and most convenient. It might even be fun taking turns deciding what you're going to do for date night.
5. Touch each other! PS: there are no rules on PDA when you are married. Who cares if it bothers other people, you are trying to connect with your lover!
6. Try new things.  Get out of your comfort zone.  We know you love the rolls at Texas Roadhouse, or that you crave the Tomato Basil Soup at Zupas.  But it's not going to hurt you to go somewhere NEW.  New foods and places not only stimulate new taste buds, but new growth! It may not be a wonderful experience every time, but it will at least give you something to talk about!
7.  Simplify.  No need to be elaborate.  Go out to eat and then stop at a park and play cards on a blanket. Or take the game home in front of the fire with drinks on a chilly evening.  The phrase "go big or go home" does not apply to date night.
8. Did I mention touching? Heck, find a place to park and do it in the back seat.  You'd be surprised what this will do for your connection. ;)
9.  Wake Up!  Yes, we all start to feel older as the years go by. And yes, we might like to be in bed by 9:30pm, but shake it off!  Stop thinking about how tired you are and let yourself feel alive again and have fun! 
10.  Feel the love.  Take a moment to look at your wife or husband and remember what you love about them.  Just a second to REALLY look at them and ENJOY being there with them.  It's easy to become SO comfortable in our relationship that we stop thinking about how truly blessed we are to be with the person we love.  Be thankful and feel free to mention it. Or even better, show them through touch. ;)

The Ultimate Bookstore Date

retrieved off google, from modernlywed.com

 My preface to this post is to emphasize the importance of DATING within your marriage.  If all you have time for is dinner, then that is better than nothing.  You can even discuss some of my fun questions over dinner, to make conversation a little more interesting. ;) But whatever you do, make it a goal to make sure you and your spouse are using the time to CONNECT with each other!

 

My husband and I went to dinner one night and then had some time to kill.  It was a cold wintery night, so anything outside was completely out of the picture.
 

Me: "bowling?" Him: "eh"

Him: "movie?" Me : "a little boring?"

To my surprise...

Him: "Let's go to a book store. I wonder if there is some kind of scavenger hunt ideas online"

Me : "ok! let me look something up!" (really thinking, "who IS this man sitting next to me?")

 

So I googled bookstore treasure hunt date and got inspiration from here and here.  

We were in the car and unable to print anything out from these websites, so I got out a pen and tore a piece of paper into strips and on each strip I wrote down something to search for. Then we would draw one out of a cup and gave ourselves 5 minutes to find the item and then return to our meeting spot. 

 

It was a pretty good date for being on the spur of the moment, but I made it my goal to revise our game a little, fix the things that didn't work so well, find some new ideas to add to it and then try it again sometime. 

 

 One of the sites we used, only had you searching for certain words in a book like Poke, Nibble, Snatch (which was hard and tedious by the way) and even antidisestablishmentarianism. As soon as I saw that word I freaked out because I remembered it from a little sesame street movie we own called "What's The Name of That Song" (which even I enjoyed watching. Would highly recommend this. haha) But my husband didn't believe me, so I had to find the clip the next day and text it to him. We thought it was pretty funny.

Ok, sorry, let's get back on track....

 

As I searched for more ideas, I was surprised to find so many other couples out there also having fun on a Bookstore Date! I found more inspiration from The Dating Divas, Love Actually,  and I found this guy blogger that had some really interesting points about a bookstore date HERE.

 

SO, by combining everything I've learned and experienced, I've created THE ULTIMATE BOOKSTORE DATE!

 

Below, you will find the search items.  Right click on it and save it to your computer, then you should be able to print it out and cut it into strips.  Fold in half and put in a ziplock bag that you can put in your purse and take with you.

 

  

There are different levels that you can play this game:

SUPER EASY GOING: choose a search item from your bag and look for it together while holding hands. 

 

NOT TOO INTENSE : choose a search item from your bag and try to bring it back to your meeting place within 15 minutes.  This is good if you like to browse and take your time. You will not get through all of the search items, but you can save them for another day

 

SEMI - COMPETITIVE : choose a search item from your bag and give yourself 8 minutes to find it, but the first person back to the meeting spot wins that round. The person who wins the most rounds gets to choose where to go for dessert!  

 

VERY COMPETITIVE:  be prepared with an extra sheet of paper to keep POINTS! choose a search item from your bag and start your phone timers at the same time for 5 minutes and then GO! Split up and find the item as fast as you can.

*1 point for actually finding a book (you'd be surprise how hard it can be to find a certain book in 5 minutes)

*1 point for the person who returned first (with a book in hand)

*1 point for whoever did better with their book selection...try to be fair ;)

The person with the most points gets to pick where to go for dessert!

 

EXTRA TIPS TO MAKE THIS DATE SUCCESSFUL:

*if you pass your date while searching for the book you can exchange a kiss, a tickle or a bum-grab

*be sure to spend a few minutes talking about the books you found

*take pictures of the books you found so you can remember what it is you or your spouse wanted to 'learn more about' or the 'recipe to cook for a future date' or your 'all-time favorite book', etc.  Just so you can remember and maybe purchase the book in the future

*go home and look up the 'places you want to visit' and make a plan to visit one of them within the next 3 years

*REALLY use the recipe you found and cook it TOGETHER on a future date

*purchase the book that could help you in the bedroom and put it into practice right away

 

If you are interested in a more LITERARY scavenger hunt, I found some good questions HERE. 

50 Random questions for a Family Road Trip

We recently had a four hour drive for a family vacation and I had brought along the cards from the game "Loaded Questions" for my husband and I.  I asked one of the questions and next thing I know, my 6 year old jumped in to answer the question and wanted me to ask more.  Before I knew it, the rest of the kids were participating. It was so fun and it helped the time pass for everyone. These can also be used for around the campfire or while you're hanging out at home.  I did have to filter through the questions to make sure they were appropriate and so I made a list of favorites to share with you.  And don't forget that mom and dad should answer too! Have fun!

 

(On a side note, these questions can also be used for a date night in addition to my previous post, "50 Fun & Random Date Night/Road Trip Questions". ) 

1.  If you were granted one wish, what would you wish for?
2.  What would be a fun, new hobby?
3.  What is something you do everyday?
4.  What is your favorite game to play?
5.  What one word is fun to say?
6.  If you could cause the extinction of any two creatures, what/who would you choose?
7.  What kind of music makes you want to get up and sing?
8.  What could you eat ten of?
9.  Who are your two biggest heroes?
10.  If you went to the video store right now, what video would you want to rent?
11.  Where is the farthest place you ever traveled in a car
12.  Where is the worst place to be stuck waiting?
13.  If you were in line at the deli, what might you order?
14.  Where is the best place to take a family vacation?
15.  What is your favorite kind of doughnut?
16.  If you could be an expert on any one subject, what would it be?
17.  What two words come to mind when you hear the word "white"?
18.  What animal comes to mind when you think of the safari?
19.  What is the most dangerous occupation?
20.  What is the first thing you do when you get out of bed?
21.  If you were a 'tough guy/girl', what would your name be?
22.  What are your two favorite ice cream toppings?
23.  What is one thing you know more about than any other person in the room?
24.  If you had to pick, which o the Seven Dwarfs is most like you?
25.  If you could perform one heroic act, what would it be?
26.  If you could possess one animal-like quality, what would it be?
27.  What is your favorite store to shop at?
28.  What song would you love to hear on the radio when you're cruising on the highway?
29.  What is your best quality about yourself?
30.  If someone were to offer you an unlimited supply of one thing (besides money), what would you ask for?
31.  What is the best thing about being alone?
32.  What do you never leave home without?
33.  Who is your most admired athlete of all-time?
34.  If you owned a professional sports team, what would be your team name?
35.  What is your favorite Disney movie?
36.  What are you thankful you're not doing right now?
37.  What is your favorite kind of candy?
38.  What is your favorite thing about your country?
39.  What animal or insect disgusts you the most?
40.  What is your favorite thing about the beach?
41.  What is the funniest thing you've ever heard of?
42.  If you could attend any sporting event, what would it be?
43.  What is the most comforting sound?
44.  What is the wildest thing you would consider doing to your hair?
45.  What one word describes your bedroom?
46.  What would make a peaceful man go insane?
47.  What frightens you?
48.  What is the MUST SEE movie out right now?
49.  What part of the world doesn't really interest you?
50.  What is your favorite activity in the pool?

50 Fun & RANDOM date night/road trip questions!

 

 

 

I've been seeing a lot of blog posts floating around out there with titles like "50 questions to ask your spouse on a date night".  Almost all have the purpose of helping you get to know each other better, but also to give you something to talk about when your mind is drawing a blank.  That happens to me ALL. THE. TIME.  Sometimes all I can think to talk about is stuff about the kids or the schedule for the week, etc.  Or sometimes television and movies are used as the prime way of spending time together.  GUILTY!  I certainly love my shows and I love cuddling with my hubby, but I've learned how important it is to stay connected, and while it's ok to have TV and cuddle time, that's NOT going to cut it if that's all you do.  

 

I like these Fun and Random questions because they're not your typical questions you'll see in other posts, like "what is your favorite food, favorite hobby, biggest dreams" or sometimes the questions get really deep so that you can really dig into your relationship and what is happening there.  Don't get me wrong...the deep stuff is important too.  In fact, I may make a future post about my favorites from those lists. But this post is to give you some questions that are a little more fun and crazy, AND yet most of them will still help you get to know your spouse a little better.  Heck, you might even laugh about some of them.  And that's what you want too...to have FUN together! ;)

 

"Research has found that people are happier when they have more fun in their lives. Studies have also shown that the most happily married couples are happy because they have a lot of fun together." -from 5 Tips To Increase The Fun In Your Marriage-

 

I found these from a board game we have. We were taking a 4 hour drive and so I just grabbed the box of cards that comes in it and left the rest of the game home.  We found that the questions on the cards not only helped us pass the time on the long drive, but we had a lot of fun with them! So whether you are hanging out in bed, out to dinner or on a road trip, have some fun with these random questions.

1. What movie deserves a sequel?
2. What one toy would you like to throw repeatedly at a brick wall?
3. What is one thing a woman should never do?
4. Who would you hate to see naked?
5. What is your favorite kind of cereal?
6. What is one thing you always wanted as a kid, but never got?
7. If you were in a witness protection program, what would be your alias?
8. What is the nicest thing someone else has done for you?
9. If you could bring someone famous back from the grave, who would you choose?
10. Where do you not mind waiting?
11. If you could lock up one person in a mental institution, who would it be?
12. What is your favorite potato chip flavor?
13. If you could project yourself into the past, were would you go?
14. What is your most impressive car repair skill?
15. What is the best sports stadium/arena you have been to?
16. What would you refuse to do for one million dollars?
17. If you were home on a rainy Sunday afternoon, what movie would you want to see on television?
18. What historical figure would you most like to have a discussion with?
19. If you could close one fast food chain, due to disgusting food, what would you pick?
20. What is one thing you refuse to share?
21. If you went to a psychiatrist, what would he/she say you suffer from?
22. If you could be on the cover of any magazine, what would you choose?
23. What makes you really sleepy?
24. What one thing annoys you most at a restaurant?
25. What do people do too much of today?
26. What is the most inspiring movie you have ever seen?
27. What household chore have you never done?
28. How do you like to relax?
29. In what part of the world would you hate to be by yourself?
30. To what would you like to devote more time?
31. What would be the best thing about not having a sense of smell?
32. Where would you not go back to for a vacation?
33. What is the scariest scene you remember from a kid's movie?
34. If you could dis-invent one thing, what would it be?
35. What always makes you a more confident person?
36. What is the greatest pain you have ever suffered?
37. If you could buy one object to complete your home, what would it be?
38. What was your favorite childhood game?
39. Who is the most famous person you have ever met?
40. If fat, calories, cholesterol, etc were not an issue, what two foods would you feast on?
41. If you could be a member of any TV-sitcom family, which would it be?
42. What is your favorite movie line or scene?
43. What part of your body could use a little lotion?
44. What language would you like to master?
45. If you were directing a movie, who would you cast as your leading man and woman?
46. Aside from lettuce, what are your two favorite salad ingredients?
47. If you had to dispose of a dead body, how would you do it?
48. Do you have a place where you would like to go and think? If so, where?
49. What is your favorite event in the Winter Olympics?
50. What profession have you always admired?

If you enjoyed these, you can find some more here:
http://www.mrdarcycheated.blogspot.com/2013/04/50-questions-for-family-road-trip.html